December 6, 2005

I've Got A Question Since I'm Still Awake

How come it seems that pretty much every day my time starts out real slow, with little happening – and then, after about 2:30, all hell breaks loose? At the start of a work day, the phone doesn’t ring, it seems there’s little to do, and nothing is urgent. By the end of a work day, my phone won’t stop ringing and deadlines are all breathing down my neck. It’s no fair. As I get things done, there should be less to do, not more. And when I get this stressed out, all I want to do is sleep -- and the stress piles up and makes real sleep that much more difficult to achieve.

So by the end of the day, my mind is aflutter with the thought of all that work left at the office, all the schoolwork I've had to do, all the running around I've had to do, all the things in my life I have to keep up with...

No wonder sleep so often eludes me at night. Too much stress is bad for sleep. No wonder I crash for so long on the weekends. The body can only sustain a sleep deficit for so long, only making interest payments, without having to start providing real rest.

If things resolve to the point where I have found employment of sufficient value to enable me to be the sole breadwinner for about a year or so while The Wife finishes her degree, and we get the new house closed and fixed up and moved in, then a lot of the big issues I'm dealing with will be off my brain and I won't have the lethargy that results from feeling a huge burden to carry around all day and the dangerous impulse to eat salty, fatty foods for the momentary feeling of satisfaction they give in the midst of what feels like otherwise-uncontrollable chaos.

Best of all, I won't have this terrible pain between my shoulder blades at the end of the day. It comes from stress and poor posture. I know of no pill which makes it go away; pretty much only a full night's sleep does that.

1 comment:

Pamela said...

Bless your heart. It will get better soon. Until then, make sure that you guys do something to relax yourselves. We need to come up with a date for you and Becky to come over for dinner and games!!