Morning Mucilage

When I get up in the morning, I’m not at my best. I wander about like a zombie, slur my words, and generally my motor skills are not at 100%. Kind of like I’m drunk, only I’m not drunk, I’m just uncoordinated.

Combine this temporary setback in anti-struggling skills with the fact that cereal manufacturers like to use about two hundred and seventy-six ounces of glue to secure box tops which are made out of cardboard whose thickness could be measured in microns.

Now you know why I can never put the tab in the slot to secure the cereal box after I first open it.